Super Mom

A TRULY delightful book dedicated to mothers, titled Super Mom, and subtitled A Guide to Kids, Family, Career and Having It All, was recently published in English by IPOC (Italian Paths of Culture).



The subtitle may at first bring to mind those shallow, commercial guides to just about anything in life. However, if one is able to brush aside this initial scepticism, one soon realises that the book contains valuable and insightful suggestions on how to renew the moral fabric of society through effective motherhood. The book highlights with enthusiasm the sacrifices, selflessness, idealism and dedication necessary for this holy mission.



The rich spiritual content of the book naturally leads one to enquire about the author. A short biographical note just before the contents-page shows that the author, a well-known personality in Italy, is no ordinary woman, nor a stay-at-home mother. The note reads: Tiziana Rocca completed her master’s degree in Economics in Geneva and is currently the director of the Rome, Italy-based public-relations firm Tiziana Rocca Communications. She is a member of the Italian Federation for Public Relations, and teaches in the master’s program in Communications at the Cinecittà Campus in Rome. As a commentator in the areas of contemporary social behaviour and current events, she is a frequent television guest and columnist. Tiziana Rocca has always devoted her attention to social issues: most of the events she organises have been for charitable causes. She was inducted into the Papal Order of Saint Gregory by the Vatican in 1997, and was recognised in 1999 by the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees.





An ideal husband





The brief biographical sketch has left out that Tiziana, aged 40, is the mother of three children, and the wife of Giulio Base, actor and renowned director of such films as: Imperium:Pompei (2007); The Inquiry (2006); St. Peter (2005); Padre Pio: Between Heaven and Earth (2000).



Despite her many commitments, Tiziana says that the main and most cherished task in this moment of her life is not that of organising gatherings and events, but that of looking after her three kids: Cristiana (12), Vittorio (7) and Valerio (6).



The book is easily read in one gulp, and opens a window into the private life of this larger-than-life woman and her family. But this is precisely where the surprise comes in. One would think that Tiziana Rocca, while looking after the interests and image of the companies and Hollywood icons she works for, should herself have been influenced by the frivolous and unscrupulous lifestyle of celebrities and high society; this, however, is not the case.



Every page of the book is replete with sound common-sense and the wisdom of traditional values. Her work enshrines that natural, time-honoured way of life whose primary purpose is that of creating a harmonious, united and happy family.





A family reality





The book is a type of diary, a ‘family reality’, where the protagonists are real people in real situations playing themselves. Page after page we come to know Tiziana’s children and her husband, grandpa Claudio, and a number of baby sitters.



Each chapter begins with a letter of the alphabet, under which a number of subjects beginning with that letter are dealt with. The G chapter, for instance, contains three separate subjects: God; Grandparents; Guilt and Separation. The subjects are first given a brief introduction, and are then explored in-depth and exemplified by personal episodes. The author tells the reader how she reacted to this or that specific challenge, and explains why she opted for this or that solution, or how she managed to approach her children about a specific problem, and the results she obtained. The answers she provides are all informed by a set of values drawn from the Christian tradition of solidarity with the poor and the outcast.



 “To have children and a family is a most beautiful thing; it is fulfilling like nothing else in life,” Tiziana told me over the phone in an enthusiastic tone of voice when I called her for this interview.





Never cease to learn





Tiziana, you have already written a number of books, like, for instance, Communicating Success – Public Relations with an Italian Flair. What was it like to write this last book of yours?



It was a very rewarding experience. It all seemed to just come out spontaneously from my heart. I have dedicated it to all those women who, like myself, are also mothers. The book has sold well in Italy and I hope it will also sell well in the US, and not for my personal gratification, but because of the ethical implications involved: part of the proceeds from the sale of the book will, in fact, sponsor projects funded by St Anthony’s Charities in favour of mothers in Africa.





Is your book a complete guide to motherhood?



By all means no. I am well aware that, even if you do your best, as a mother you can never reach perfection – you never cease to learn!





What is the most important value we can teach our children?



All moral values are important. However, religious faith should come first and foremost because all other virtues draw life and strength from this central value. I believe it is important to teach children to pray as early as possible. My children always say grace before meals and before going to bed, and we always go to church on Sunday – it is supremely important to set an example in these cases. As parents we try to show them a path. However, when they grow up, we will always respect their choices, even though they may be different from the ones we have chosen.





A good education





What type of behaviour should children avoid?



Selfishness, because this vice destroys and degrades human nature. It is the root of all other evils. My husband and I always pay great attention to the needs of the poor, and persuade our children to do likewise by encouraging them to donate a small coin or comforting words to those in need.



When planning our family budget we always set aside a portion of our income for the distance adoption of an Indian girl who sends us letters and photos every now and then. In this way we become role models of solidarity for our children, and we also try to make them aware of how lucky they are.





According to statistics, the television has become the primary influence on our children because they spend more time in front of the screen than with their parents.



Unfortunately, this is an undeniable fact that should worry us. Like all modern methods of information, television has great potential for good, but only if used well. I am convinced that children should, above all, talk with their parents more often. Dialogue is the best way of imparting a good education. In our family it has first place. However, we are often so busy that, in order to talk more among ourselves, we have had to devise a number of techniques, like turning the TV off when we’re together and telling each other what happened to us during the day.





Role models





Children are fascinated by videogames. Do you think they are helpful?



Games are very important because they develop the intellect and help children to grow. However they must be healthy games. Videogames do not belong to this category, and I don’t allow them in my home. Obviously, they see them whenever they go to their friends’ homes, and then they ask us to buy them when they come back. We justify our decision by telling them that we want them to lead a ‘real’ life, not a ‘virtual’ one.



In practical terms this means that if they want to play tennis, soccer or go horse-riding, we do it for real, out in the open, and not on a video.





Do children listen?



If we, as parents, have managed to win over their trust and respect, then they will certainly listen to us. They think things over, talk to us, perhaps object to the things we say, and in the end they learn from us. But it is important to be good role-models. Many parents believe that, to give one’s children a good education, it is enough to send them to a good school. Nothing could be further from the truth. A good school can certainly do a great deal, but what children receive at home is even more important.





You have organised hundreds of events for VIPs and celebrities like Meryl Streep, Robert De Niro, Sylvester Stallone and others. Of all these people, which is the one you most admire?



Maryl Streep, beyond doubt. She is a woman of the heart, but intelligent, balanced and unassuming at the same time. She has managed to bring up four happy children, and has a beautiful relationship with her husband. I have met her children, and found them to be very courteous and well-mannered. I also admire her ability to retain her class and dignity in all circumstances. The most important thing she has taught me is that it is not necessary to trample over your competitors to have success. She is a woman of deep moral values, but professional at the same time. I admire her greatly as an actress and as a person.