I Am Angry!

DEAR FRIAR RICK: Because of increasing evidence of the Church’s evasion and cover up of sex-abuse scandals, these months are ones of deep conflict for me. The crimes committed by priests worldwide, and covered up by the hierarchy are not trivial – they are crimes against innocent children. How can I, a mother of two children, raise them up in a Church with such a history? The Pope’s letter to Irish Catholics is way too late coming. I actually think that the Vatican has a lot to answer for because it tried to protect a bunch of criminals. Do you have words that can ease my anger?



I have no interest in easing your anger. You should be angry! I am angry. I am angry at the thought of even one priest betraying the innocence and trust of a child. I am angry at bishops and Vatican officials who made avoiding scandal a higher priority than reporting criminals to the police. I am angry at the denial still heard in some parts of the world, phrases like “That’s an American or Irish problem,” or “We don’t have such priests in this country”. I am angry at people trying to promote their political agenda by mocking celibacy, blaming gay priests or excoriating the Holy Father. Yes, I am angry too.



Let us pray that you and I are not just left with anger. This painful situation needs more light than heat! Let us turn to the fundamental question that you ask: How can I, a mother of two children, raise them up in a Church with such a history? Well, I’ve got news for you. The Church has had some pretty bad moments in its history… some of them even worse than what we see now. Corruption, greed and violence have all been part of the Church’s history. Why? Because the Church is carried on the shoulders of humans and not of angels. We are all sinners. As Archbishop Thomas Collins of Toronto wrote regarding this crisis: “There is a good reason why Jesus gave his disciples the Sacrament of Reconciliation as an Easter gift. We all need it… The reality of abuse is rooted deeply in the fact of fallen humanity, and in the evil that can infect the human heart. It is found throughout society. Though we may never expect to be fully rid of it, we must never cease to try to do so.”



The fact that the rate of abuse of children by Catholic priests is below the rate found in society in general or among other professions is no excuse. The notion that bishops thought these problems were ‘moral errors’ or ‘sins’ that could be remedied through prayer and penance is past. The excuse that psychologists once thought and recommended that abusers could be rehabilitated does not cut muster. Any case of abuse by a priest needs to be immediately acknowledged, the police need to be called and the priest held responsible for his actions. Period!



One of the most difficult aspects of this whole mess is that most of the accusations date back quite a few years, when the Church and society dealt with such issues in a very different way. In the past, if a young girl became pregnant, the family would often send her away to have the child in secret and then put the child up for adoption. The honour of the family, and the girl’s reputation, had to be preserved. Today families are more open about painful realities, and deal with them as best they can in the full light of day. Hopefully. The Church too has changed much. Priests and religious are trained to be aware and honest about their sexuality, their feelings, and to develop their ability to enter into healthy, intimate relationships that respect their call to celibate chastity, and also respects the dignity of the other person. Candidates for priesthood are screened before ordination. Many religious communities and dioceses have clear policies and protocols for maintaining ethical relationships with minors.



During this difficult time we should be grateful for the hundreds of thousands of priests who serve the People of God and are such wonderful, caring and warm role-models for children. We should give thanks for the women and men religious who faithfully journey with us as sisters and brothers, especially with those of us who are poor, marginalized or hurting. Finally, we should be most grateful to Almighty God for more that 1 billion Catholic lay men and women who faithfully preach the Gospel every day, not in words, but through lives of sacrifice, service and prayer.